Sea of Tears

In a dirty river,
how can I see deep into the water?
In a corrupted mind,
how can I really understand other?

While trying to be good is not
as easy as talking good.
While being nice is not
as simple as acting nice.
To really understand others is not
yet within my reach.

While playing in the beach;
in hoping to have sunny day -
How could I not be aware that
the farmers badly need the rain,
for the dry-dying crop?

While arguing about some rupiah with tukang-bajaj,
that I would use to buy a piece of cake anyway,
How could I not be aware that
it means a month school tuition for his son,
a nice kid with a big dream.

Once I really want to get a new car;
like anybody else in the school.
I want it badly like a child who wants a new toy.
but then father reminds me of the unlucky ones,
How could I not be aware!
and be more careful to enjoy the feeling of envy.
because after all,
What do I know about envy?
Who am I to judge other to not be envy?

I am not a politician, yet I still have to
think twice -
before giving an opinion,
before stating my principal.
I guess I ignore my inner-heart too much,
that it rarely talks to me now.

While watching brothers fighting to each other.
or neighbors in afar island killing each other,
creating a civil war.
How do I know who is right? who is wrong?
is belief to be considered? - skin color is?
- the stronger group is?

What do I know?
What do I know.....
about the pain of each side,
the bitterness of seeing your relatives being killed.
the bitterness of seeing your 20 years of hardwork being burned.
What do I know...
Who am I to judge.....

What should I do...
Watching in a distance?
While my surrounding are praying and ignoring at the same time.
While fathers are preaching with his eyes closed.
Who am I to say this,
but I can't keep still,
and say that this is a perfect world..

I wish that God takes away the colors from our life.
what is the purpose of this colorful world,
if the reds are made from blood,
the green from envy, and the blue from sadness;
alas the water are all tears, and sweat, sweat of hatred.

Who am I to say this,
I'm not a guy who religiously pray every day,
I'm not a guy who would actually go there to help them,
Maybe after all I could be categorized as
one of those ignorant bastards I curse whenever - I am in a bad mood!
the guy who drive good car, talking about so-called wisdom,
But ignoring the hungry fellas back home.

God, if you are reading this,
bless me with more wisdom, and courage.
ofcourse, unless it is not your plan.
but God, at least;
Would you mind to give foods to thousands starving children
only a slight effort for You maybe,
but it means thousands smiles for people down here.